Thursday, December 02, 2004


The Barkays Must Be Having Trouble Getting Gigs.

He tried sanding them off. He tried slamming them off. And mitts only hid the problem.

There was no way around it - Tirso Furcal had extra fingers.

Surgery Removes Man's Extra Digits.

Yeah, I'd kinda want to get that removed, too.

Tirso Furcal's extra finger and two extra toes made life in his impoverished country, the Dominican Republic, even more difficult. The stone polisher struggled to walk and his frequent injuries blocked his hopes for better-paying work.

Now, thanks to the generosity of a hospital and surgeons in Jersey City, the extra digits have been removed and Furcal, 41, is healing quickly. Next week, he will return to his wife and three children in his village, Brisas de los Palemeras, a region where several other residents, mainly children, also have extra fingers and toes.

Excuse me? Other people in this region have the same problem? What, pray tell, is in the water there? Shouldn't the EPA take a quiet little foreign trip to study this problem? Just in case pollution is causing extra digits, we should make sure we don't see this in America.

Then again, the pollution's probably already here. The guy went to see a *New Jersey* doctor, after all. Coincidence? Hmmm.

Anyways, I don't see why he had to bother with surgery. Handi-Off would've done the trick just fine.

Hmmm... could the Dominican Republic be the site where the Aliens have been doing those cross-breeding experiments?
Shhh. . .
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