Thursday, December 16, 2004

 

This Man Is My Own Personal Jesus.

H/T to my buddy Ranger for this incredible-but-true story: Man on vodka binge blows .462.
As Wilson made that first tentative step, his legs crumpled, he collapsed to his knees, lurched forward and smacked his head on the driver's side door, police stated.

His words were close to unintelligible but he allegedly managed to reveal he had been drinking for two weeks.

It was 4.15pm and on that day alone, October 24, 2003, he had managed to finish off one-and-a-half bottles, or 35 nips, of vodka to record a blood-alcohol reading of .462.

Experts are amazed he is alive.
Wow, so am I. This guy must have, like, ninja powers or something.

Hell, Ted Kennedy needs to swill Everclear for a month to get his blood-alcohol anywhere near this number.

I wonder if Wilson's abilities are genetic, or if he can train others. I'd want to learn at his feet, perhaps become a Vodka Padawan.

Alas, he's in Australia, and I hear flying there takes, like, six weeks. Maybe a book-on-tape?

Oh, one last thing-- ya gotta love how the story ends:
NSW Police confirmed the highest recorded drink driving reading in the state was a woman who blew .572 - more than 11 times the legal .05 limit - in Orange in 2002.

She had just dropped her children at school.
Who here wants to bet she looked a lot like Jill Russell?

Comments:
Personally, I think it is all getting too commercialized, you know? Corporate sponsors, expensive, specialized equipment, performance-enhancing drugs, the old pros -the greats, the legends- must be spinning in their graves at these sell-outs. These guys just drag around IV trees dripping some exotic super-liquor into their veins rather than slam down shots like the old-timers did, that took skill, strategy, and stamina. The soul is gone, man. All that's left of professional drunkery a cash-animated corpse with a ginormous liver.
 
Chilperic--

I agree. If anything, it's even worse than what you say:

http://www.nytimes.com/2004/12/12/magazine/12VAPOR.html?ex=1103864400&en=acc34a14580798af&ei=5006&partner=ALTAVISTA1
 
My first H/T!! Woo hoo!
 
Congratulations, Ranger. You've taken your first steps into a larger world.
 
Hey, you have a very interesting blog here. I'm definitely going to bookmark you.

I have a drug rehab search.org
site/blog. It pretty much covers ##KEYWORD## related stuff.

Come and check it out if you get time :-)
 
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