Thursday, January 20, 2005

 

Things Overheard At The Inauguration.

-- "Why is it so effin' cold? We failed to pass Kyoto for *this*?"
-- "I hear the President's speech is going to be word-for-word recitation of the lyrics to Phish's 'Fee.'"
-- "You know what John Kerry and John Edwards have in common?"
"What?"
"Neither of them are speaking today, thank Ohio."
-- "Clarence, Tony. . . could you both please stop asking how I feel?"
-- "I think I just saw Keith Olberman double-checking the count for standing-room-only tickets."
-- "Bill, the
Counter-Inaugural Ball is supposed to have a $500 sex room in the Penthouse."
"Really? Be a doll and grab Hillary's purse, will you?"
-- "Too bad Homeland Security cancelled the laser light show."
-- (
In the background) "We hate Bush! We hate Bush!"
"Are those protesters I hear?"
"Either that, or Playboy photo editors."
-- "No Senator Kennedy, there is no drink cart on this plane. In fact, this is not even a plane."
-- "My fellow Americans, we will defeat the evildoers with our soopeerior strategery. . ."


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